The Zap - the site the Chinese government is currently using as its home page

Monday, January 07, 2008

Hello blog

I feel like I've been neglecting you recently, and man, THAT SHIT AIN'T RIGHT. But it's okay, because I'm here now. I've stayed up all night, which isn't actually as remarkable a feat as it sounds seeing as I spent most of yesterday sleeping, but still, I'm starting to feel the effects of the sleep deprivation. I couldn't even remember the word "deprivation". It took me ages. And just now, when I was saying that, I spelt it "deprevation". And before, when I was saying I'd been neglecting you, I wanted to say I'd been depriving you. And conversely, while I was trying to remember the word "depriving", the only word I could think of was "neglecting". But then I remembered how I wanted to say "depriving" when I needed to say "neglecting", and I just switched them round, and everything was OKAY. Man, sleep is AWESOME. I'm sure I'll be fine though, because I have you and you have me, and other than that, what else really matters? That's a tautology. Never mind. Well, maybe not a tautology, but a redundancy. The "else" is redundant. Or the "other". Take your pick. I mean, I'm not saying I'm not sure which is redundant - they both could be, just if you say one is, then the other is necessary. Is that a tautology? A tautology's like "single bachelor", innit. This probably isn't a tautology. Who cares. Man, we're going to have all sorts of crazy, lack-of-sleep-fuelled adventures today! I've already started writing a poem. It's called "Me, Ben Stiller and Tom Cruise". It goes like this:

Out on the town with Ben Stiller and Tom Cruise,
Tom feels left out 'cause me and Ben are both Jews.

That's all I've got so far. There'll probably be a bit where I mock Tom Cruise for being a Scientologist at some stage. Because that so hasn't been done before. Hehe. Firefox says "Scientologist" isn't a word. You got pwned, Scientologists! PWNED. Or I spelt it wrong and I got pwned. That would make me sad-face :(. Wait, let me Google... Nope, I spelt it right. Hehe. Pwned. There was this really good scene in Boston Legal about Scientology. <3 Boston Legal. Here is a link. Bye bye!