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Monday, September 22, 2008

I asked out a barmaid

I don't know why I'm just telling you this now; it happened a while ago. It's quite a good story though, and I haven't posted anything for ages, so I thought I might as well. It's my 100th entry too, so enjoy.

So about 4 months ago, I was at a club with my friend. We went up to the bar, he asked me what I was having and I said "The barmaid", because she was quite pretty. I'd kind of fancied her for a while but I'd never considered doing anything about it. Then he asked me if he could borrow some money, so I said only if he told the barmaid I liked her. So he said he would, then I said "Omg, don't! I'll only lend you the money if you promise *not* to tell her I like her!" So he said he wouldn't and I lent him the money (which I think he still owes me, but that's getting away from the point).

The barmaid brought our drinks over, and despite my friend's promise, he said to her "My friend thinks you're really lovely", to which she replied "He's right - I am". I retorted with "Well I'm just glad my assessment of you was correct", before realising how awkward the whole thing was and walking away.

I sat embarrassed for a few minutes before deciding that surely the ice had been broken, the hard part was over and I should ask her out, so I wrote down my number on a flyer. Unfortunately, it took about half an hour for me to get my confidence up, and by the time I had, she'd disappeared. I waited for about half an hour, went and got something to eat, came back but she still was nowhere to be seen. Assuming she'd gone home, I put my number in my pocket and did likewise, with the intention of asking her out the following week.

So the next week, I returned with my friends, as planned, only for her to have apparently been given the week off. "Don't worry," my friends told me. "She'll be back next week". So, not wanting to see this week as a missed chance, I spent the whole of the following week preparing exactly what I was going to say and how I was going to say it. My whole week basically became geared toward asking this girl out. Then on the Thursday, one by one, each of my friends dropped out, until I had no one to go with. Still, I'd been waiting all week for this, so I decided to go alone (free entry before 10 o'clock anyway).

She was there, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I needed that voice of reassurance from one of my friends telling me it was the right moment, and I didn't have that, so I moped home after about 45 minutes of indecision, generally hating myself, and spent the rest of the night wondering whether I should go back and try again, until the club closed and it was taken out of my hands.

By the time the *next* week came around, I'd kind of lost all momentum. Previously, I'd had a real determination about it. Now everything just seemed murky in my head. I wasn't even sure I fancied her that much anymore. But my friends rallied round, told me I had to go and I went in for what I'd decided would be my final attempt (I go home from uni next Monday, so if I'd left it any later, there wouldn't have been any point).

Like I said though, I'd lost all momentum by this point, so as I walked there, I just kept asking myself why I was bothering. I really didn't want to do it. But then I saw her face and it all came back. I still lacked that confidence I'd had before though, so it took a good half hour for to even consider asking her out. Then, as the place began to empty, I worried that they were going to let her go home early again. She went over to the door and started talking to the doorman, and I worried that I'd missed my chance. So as soon as I saw her walking back over to the bar, I got up from my seat and - despite the fact that all but one of my friends had gone off for a smoke and I was alone once again - intercepted her.

"Excuse me," I said.
"You talking to me?" She asked.
"Umm... yes? Is that okay?"
"Oh, yes, of course. Sorry, I just thought that maybe I was in your way."
"Oh no, no." We both laugh. "Look, here's the thing," I continue. "You're going to be here every week because you work here, and I'm going to be here every week because I like it here..."
"You like it here?"
"Yeah, you know - the seats and... drinks... and... stuff. Anyway, all that's going to happen is, I'm going to keep looking over to you, thinking "Should I ask her out? Shouldn't I?", and... well, I wrote my number down about a month ago. My friend told you I thought you were love. I don't know if you remember. I didn't actually say you were lovely..." She appears concerned. "I mean, I said complimentary things, but you know... He was paraphrasing." She appears relieved. "So I was going to give you my number then but you went home before I got a chance, so I came back the following week but... you don't want to here about any of that. Basically, this is my number..." I put my hand in my pocket, but she interrupts me before I've even had a chance to grab the flyer with my number scrawled across it.
"That's very sweet, but I already have a boyfriend and I really, really love him."
"Really, *really*?"
"Really, really."
"Well, if that changes at all..."
"...I'll give you a shout. What's your name by the way?" She extends her arm and we shake hands.
"I'm Adam."
"Rachel. Nice to meet you."
"Even your name is nice..." I sigh as I turn away and she returns to the bar. I guess I'll never know if she heard me.


  • I'm still waiting for the punchline.

    By Anonymous J Fizzle, at 11:01 pm  

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